Can you believe it? 4 years ago I ran my first half marathon. A few months later, I decided to start a blog. The goal was just to share stories. Truthfully, I just got tired of always answering “How did your race go?”. So, I figured why not tell stories on a blog and people could go and read. I had no idea 4 years later what See Sharp Run would of turned into. I’ve rebranded by blog to the awesome platform it is now with so much help from friends like Fresh, Brian, and Becca. I’ve learned a lot. I’ve made some mistakes. I’ve inspired people. I’ve helped people. I’ve raised questions. Apparently, I’ve made quite an impact.Enjoy a glass of #Lemonade with Sharpie as he celebrates his 4th anniversary of running Click To Tweet
You’re probably asking why I named this post Lemonade, right? This post is about to get REAL honest, so buckle up. I’m not holding any punches back.
My blog has not only become a place where I share stories, experiences, and products. It’s become a place of therapy for me. There is something freeing about having a space where you can write and elicit feedback from people who follow your journey. And let me just say, the vast majority of you that read this blog offer some incredible feedback, perspective, and encouragement. I read every single comment, and try to comment where and when I can. A few weeks ago, I wrote a post essentially about pressure and burn out. Every comment on that post was amazing. I received lot of “maybe you should try this.” or “be honest with yourself, it’s really ok” type of responses. These are responses that are constructive and helpful as I process. So I want to take a moment to thank you all.
I lost track of why I do what I do in the first place. And I don’t necessarily think I lost it, it got buried by distraction. I never started out wanting to be the fastest runner. CAN I be a fast runner? Certainly. Is that what I focused on? No. Do I enjoy running especially with people? Oh absolutely. I’ve had some of my best therapy sessions on the road or on the trails. There is something to be said for continuous improvement and being a better version of yourself. Being realistic about what that looks like and how you get there is the key. A journey is just that. A journey. Normally when you set out of a trip, you have a map and an idea of what you want to do. Realistic milestones. Things that make sense for YOU. The only person putting pressure on myself is me. The rest of the noise is nothing more than an amplified version of the noise I created. This creates a series of events that aren’t generally positive for anyone, then you get lemons.
Allow me to continue aboard the honesty train. I was ready to shut this blog down. I had my phone in my hand and was ready to call my people and say close it down. I’m done. I had been battling a depression low since Boston (yeah I wasn’t myself there) and truthfully, I wasn’t sure this was doing me any good. I wanted to stop. Then something happened and you’ll probably laugh but it’s true…Beyonce gave us Lemonade.
When I watched the Lemonade visual on HBO I was moved. There was a particular visual and song which will be my favorite and honestly saved this space. The song is called “Freedom”. When I tell you I got OUT OF MY CHAIR when this song came on! Let me explain.
“Freedom” is about coming out on the other end of your situation and freeing yourself from the pain and negativity you have been buried under. It’s about breaking chains. It’s about standing on your feet stronger because you’ve gone through something rough. There is a line in the song where she says “I’m gonna keep running because winners don’t quit on themselves.”
This is the point where I received all of my life.
She, as usual, is right. Winners don’t quit. Look at the wonderful things I have created and contributed to. Look how many people I have touched. I’m allowed to have a bad day, a bad week, hell a bad month. But it’s about how you come out on the other end and quitting isn’t the way to do that. Same can be said for a race that doesn’t go your way. Same can be said for ANYTHING in life. So this blog is here to stay whether or not other folks think it should or not…but I don’t know those people and don’t really care what they think so…
All that to say, I am greatful, blessed, and honored to be in the position that I am in. To share, to engage, to represent. This has been lots of hard work. Far more smiles than frowns. But going forward, I’ll be doing exactly what I said I would do when I turned 30…stay accountable, have fun, and focus on self care. Not every race has to be a PR. If I want one, I’ll pick a race and train for it. Until then, I’ll enjoy running for the gift it is. I’ll enjoy the people and community that support that. I’ll smile and continue to inspire. I’ll continue to learn for every day. I’ll continue to make mistakes because humans do that. I’ll continue to learn from them. I’ll continue to be optimistic and realistic. I’ll continue to enjoy the Lemonade…instead of focusing on the mountain of perceived lemons.
Thank you to each and every one of you for your love and support and honesty over the years. It really does mean the world. Have a glass of lemonade. I can’t begin to do what I do without all of your support. And that is so real. Let’s celebrate and smile. Because today is a new day.
Freedom! Freedom! I can’t move
Freedom, cut me loose!
Singin’, freedom! Freedom! Where are you?
Cause I need freedom too!
I break chains all by myself
Won’t let my freedom rot in hell
Hey! I’ma keep running
Cause a winner don’t quit on themselves